2016 had a lot of ups and downs for me and for everyone. Still not over the fact that 3 of my favorite artists are now gone. As Captain Jack Sparrow said, "The World's the same. There's just less in it." We had a terrible election in this country that was just full of terrible choices. Yet, I now have a great boyfriend and a place to live and keep exploring cooking. The downside is that I'm drowning in debt and need to continue recovering from trauma.
I hope in 2017 to be brave. I want to reduce my debt load as much as possible, so it will be even more of not going out or buying clothes or shoes unless absolutely necessary. I will also stop bringing my wallet into work and carrying credit cards. I also want to see my friends more and possibly make new ones. I know that this might require money, but it's not necessarily true. I mean I have movies and can make popcorn. I also want to have a tea party again, but that takes some planning. My friend gave me a coupon book, so that could help me tremendously.
I would also like to be more comfortable with myself. My job makes me feel like crap because it's very stressful and it really shouldn't be. I am taking a real vacation for the first time in 4 years. I am going to visit my parents in Israel, which is costing me very little. I think while I am there, I will have time to make a plan and decide what I really want.
I will be cutting out soda as of January 1. I will try my best to eat healthy even though I won't be able to get as many fresh ingredients as I would like. Hopefully, my friend will visit for a cooking weekend this year. This might get me better at planning meals and being able to make my own bagels. I don't want to use the things in my pantry or my gift cards just yet because that would mean that I have failed as an adult. I am not great at asking for help.
I also want to be happy with my body. I am 50lbs over what my goal weight is. Even with the weight loss, I'll still be curvy, but not as big. I should also be able to do the physical activities I like with greater ease. I also contacted an art professor at the local college to be a model for one of their drawing classes. Part of that is to be around people who have artistic talent and partly to be more comfortable with my body. I also think having a contact in the college, might help me get a job there eventually.
I would also like to be able to be me. The real not depressed me. I know the depression will be there lurking even in remission. I just want to be better at ignoring it. Better at dealing with it. I just want to be better in 2017.
