What I Fear Most

After the events of the past week, I have been writing a complaint.  I have all the "evidence" against me listed and will refute all of it.  I am claiming discrimination based on disability, which is depression.  Not every person with a mental illness is violent nor are they a danger to others.  However, many people have this notion from the constant media coverage of every school shooting focusing on how they were mentally ill.  What I fear the most is the witch hunt, stigma and ostracism of everyone who divulges their mental illness.

I fear that the people with mental health difficulties will always be labeled as crazy and dangerous.  I am not dangerous to myself or others.  Do I show poor judgement?   Unfortunately, that is often.  This happens when I am underemployed and do not use my one talent, my mind.  What they did was add to a problem, not end it.  Compassion heals and solves problems.

I fear that people with any type of mental health condition that disclose to their employers will be put under the same scrutiny that I was.  It was a charge where the odds were stacked against me based on paranoia and hearsay.  The evidence they had would not hold up in court for a commitment hearing because I am not a danger to myself or others.  I am under medical supervision and actively participate in my recovery.  The mind takes longer to heal than the body.

I am glad to be out of that toxic environment, however, I feel sorry for all the good people that are still there, especially him.  He is no longer the person I cared about.  He is withdrawn and rarely makes any jokes or appears to smile like he used to.  He's not the friend I adored.  Everyone deserves better because that company does not care about their employees and is not a positive work environment.  Their communication was also horrible.

I know that this battle will be long and arduous.  I am prepared to fight for people like me who struggle to make it through the day.  I hope that my fear will not be realized.  I hope that we can change as a species and be compassionate towards those that suffer.  Maybe depression will not reach the epidemic proportions that is estimated.  It will take a lot of work, but I can fight.  I am stronger than anyone knows.