I've mentioned previously that I'm designing and implementing training at my office. It's something that I enjoy doing and it's having some success at the moment. I am so proud of myself for being innovative enough to do something to fix the slump in sales. I told him about the feelings of pride as well as the successes and he seemed just as pleased as me. I think he's trying to get me to change my personal motto to "strive." It might one day because everyday I strive to get better. It's a difficult process as most know, but I'm working on it.
During our e-mail conversation, he asked me what I thought about a project he was thinking of implementing. We were sending e-mails back and forth about how to get the material, if it was a good idea, how long it would last etc. He thanked me for the suggestions that I made. It felt good to collaborate with him again on a project. It's a start as it shows progress towards healing.
It's great to start to feel warm and complete inside again. I know that it won't be like this everyday, but I have something to fall back on. I have the hope things will get better in time.
As for personal goals, I still plugging away at them. I'm hoping to finish the major one of paying off my credit card by January. After that everything else should roll in. I am not pretending to be anything else besides me anymore.
I may come off as superior and demeaning at time because I am that intelligent. Sometimes it's difficult to be around people not as brilliant as me. That's probably why I liked him so much because he is that intelligent. I am me. I am crazy, messy, intelligent, and beautiful because there is no one else like me in the world. No one has to like me, but I cannot always change they way I am. I can only keep striving and succeeding.
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